The day begins at eight o'clock. After a light breakfast with a glass of tea, he heads to the rink for another day on the job. Once he arrives, he heads to the locker room for the 10 am morning skate. After a light skate, he heads home. Once he gets back home, about seven hours before game time, the preparation begins.
After having a turkey sandwich with a protein shake, he heads back to sleep until 3:04. When he wakes up, he throws on his suit, eats a PB&J and heads back to the office for the game. At the rink, he completes his routine warm-up, stretches, and focuses on the game ahead. Then, he heads back to the locker room and tapes his sticks. Once his equipment is ready, he puts on his hockey equipment, putting each piece on left to right.
An hour before game time, the boys hit the ice for warm-ups. When there is a minute and thirty-three seconds remaining in warm-ups, the goalie heads off the ice and back to the locker room. Once it’s game time, the goalie leads his team out onto the ice. He has spent almost eleven hours preparing for this, the big game.
Each play, he can either make a save or give up a goal, win the game, or lose it, be a hero, or be hated. After a save, the crowd goes wild. After a goal, the crowd boos and chants, "sieve" as they mock the humiliated goalie. As the clock ticks down, the opposing team fires shot after shot, but the goalie comes up big. The buzzer sounds. He gets the win. Preparation was vital to his success. He then heads off the ice, ready to do it all again. 
Maybe work on the last paragraph a bit. After "He gets the win," it doesn't flow as well as the rest. Good job otherwise.
ReplyDeletei like the way the story is told it is very well put together.
ReplyDeleteI would say make it more personal. It sounds like a list in some paragraphs
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